Gorblefunks

Scroll down for the original stories behind the episode!

Gorlefunks

by Nicolas and Daniel, brothers from Eswatini

Buy a gorblefunk! Buy one now! Buy 97 and get 1 free! It will clean your room and give you good dreams; you can even lick it! What is it? Well, the simple answer is... we don't know. Now buy a gorblefunk.

Click to Read Original Stories from Other Episodes.

Roll Call Stories

Scroll down to read the original stories or watch Peter and Lee read them and react here:

The Man Who Was Mad

by Beatrix, age 6, Australia

Once upon a time, there was a man and he had a wife. The man and his wife had two children. There was a boy, he was 10 years old, and his name was Jonathan. And there was a girl who was 7 years old and her name was Daisy.

One day, a bird swooped their dads hat off his head. He was mad. And then they all climbed on each other to try to get the birdies. Daisy wasn't holding on because she got distracted by another bird and they all fell down.

The end.

Oh No!!!!!!!!!!!!

by Calvin, age 7, Indiana

Once upon a time, there was a trained ninja and an untrained ninja. The untrained ninja screams “HELLO!” The trained ninja says “you don’t need to shout.” There was also a mad scientist. The mad scientist says “muahahahaha”. The mad scientist made a GIANT robot alligator (while saying “muahahaha”). The giant robot alligator attacked the city. The city building has “in case of a tornado enter ->”. The mad scientist and giant robot alligator say “muahahaha”. Then the giant robot alligator ate the two ninjas, “nom, nom, nom”. In the giant robot alligator’s mouth there was a laser. The untrained ninja walked into the laser and froze. Then the other ninja did a backflip and broke the ice (that froze the other ninja). The ninjas are inside the robot alligator because it ate them. Then they punched his mouth and destroyed his mouth and escaped. Then they defeated the mad scientist and the giant robot alligator and kicked them to the moon. Then they went to the candy realm and had a super ice cream sledding party. The trained ninja says “the end!”

I am a Doodoo Daadaa

by Marina, age 5, Texas

I am a doodoodaadaa. I have never had this thing before, but this is so fun. I am so silly. When someone that’s sad sees me, they cheer right up because I’m so silly.

I am a doodoodaadaa. I know why I am so silly. Because I have silly arms, a silly head, a silly body, my whole body is silly! Because I am a doodoodaadaa, my name is Doodoodaadaa.

I am so funny and sillyyyy. I couldn’t wait for my silly show I won it because I was the silliest at the show. Because I am a doodoodaadaa, I am a doodoodaadaa, I am a doodoodaadaa, I am a doodoodaadaa yeah. Doo, doo, doodoodaadaa. Doo, doo, doodoodaadaa.

I am a doodoodaadaa. I’m the only one in this place. This is not funny, because everyone is not silly in this place. I am the only one that’s silly and funny. I am so silly and funny. Because I am a doodoodaadaa. I am a doodoodaadaa. Doo doo doo doo doo doo daa daa. The end!

The Purple Hot Dog

Scroll down for the original stories behind the episode!

The Purple Hot Dog

by Clara, age 9, Colorado

"Riiiing!!"

"Okay kids, as your principal, it is my responsibility to make announcements. Your teacher is sick, because he took a bite out of an uncooked hot dog. So today you get a sub. Everyone say hello to Mr. Hot Dog!"

(Class) "Hello Mr. Hot Dog!"

(Mr. Hot Dog) "Actually, it's PURPLE hot dog."

(Principal) "Oh, well have fun!"

(Purple Hot Dog) "So what exactly IS this school thing?"

(Student) "Why are you a sub...?"

(Purple Hot Dog) "Actually I'm NOT a sub (like the sandwich). I'm a Purple Hot Dog!"

(Student) "Okay! Okay! We get it!"

(Different student) "Wait! Hot dog! I mean PURPLE hot dog. You look like someone has taken a bite out of you!"

(Purple Hot Dog) "Someone did!"

(Class) "Who?!"

(Purple Hot Dog) "Someone called... wait what was his name? Oh yeah! John Pantsface!"

(Class) "John Pantsface?! He's our teacher! -- Wait, are you an uncooked hot dog?"

(Purple Hot Dog) "An uncooked PURPLE hot dog."

(Police) "Mr. Hot Dog you're coming with us!"

(Purple Hot Dog) "PURPLE hot dog!"

The End!

Click to Read Original Stories from Other Episodes.

Roll Call Stories

Scroll down to read the original stories or watch Peter and Lee read them and react here:

Nice Mouse and Grumpy Monster

by Bihaan, age 7, Canada

Joshua was eating snacks on the table. Mummy there is a monster in the microwave. Mummy opened and saw there us no monster. Joshua saw the green grumpy monster in the microwave. There was also a mouse who lived in the microwave/ They both played soccer inside. Monster kicked the ball then it hit the mouse's eye. Monster gave him a pirate eye patch. Joshua was watching the soccer match. He gave cheese to mouse and smarties to monster. Mouse was not mean. Mouse played with monster. Monster gave eye patch to mouse. Both were nice and got prizes.

Double Dare

by Edie, age 6, Tennessee

It was the witch! They bravely opened the door. And they rushed in! Peeking in, and then they walked in the door, not knowing that the witch was behind it. She grabbed the first kid! But the other two managed to escape. They came up with a plan. One of them rushed in sneakily, hid behind her cauldron, and the other hid by the door. And then, as the witch was about to drop the kid in, they put their plan into action. The one behind the cauldron popped up and then the witch was in so much shock that she fell over, dropping the first kid on the ground. The other kid, who was hiding behind the door, helped the first one out, and they all ran out, shutting the door and locking it. And they did not look back until they were home. And all the same, they never double dared each other again! The end.

Pirate and Gold

by Gavin, age 4, Colorado

This is how it really starts. We were on a ship and on that ship was a treasure box. And in that treasure box was gold. Then we dug into the dirt on the ship and we found some pirate bones and a pirate hat. And we wanted to put them together. And when we put them together and they looked like a pirate we put the hat on and the pirate came alive. And the bad guy, the ghost, was never seen again until that day. A long, long time ago they were fighting, the pirate and the ghost. The pirate found the gold that he hid. It wasn't every kind of gold. Inside was chocolate and the chocolate was so cold it lasted 300 days. And when he ate 2 pieces of chocolate, he got stronger every day. And soon, he had a really good trap that nothing can get out of except good pirates. And when he saw the ghost again he pulled the rope and trapped him. And when he trapped him, he did the same thing as the pirate and he was never seen again.

The Exploding Pig + The Snarky Calculator

Today’s bonus episode features a brand new story written by over a hundred different members of the Story Pirates Creator Club!

The next Create a Story session is coming up on Friday, July at 12pm ET. Your kids can join Peter and Lee to make a new story in a virtual Create a Story session and hear it come to life on the podcast! Create a Story Zooms happen four times per year for our Premium Creator Club members. To join us, sign up for a Premium membership!

All Creator Club memberships also include Podcast Plus, where you can hear even more bonus episodes like this one and listen to the Story Pirates Podcast ad-free!

Scroll down for the original stories behind the episode!

The Exploding Pig & The Snarky Calculator

by Premium Creator Club Memberes

George the broken calculator (because he was dropped in a pool)- Has really shiny hair - Snarky - He kinda just looks like a robot - Has a catch phrase “A broken calculator is right twice a day”. He’s bad at mad - Nice and he has an eye patch. Has bread (bigger than Peter’s) and has great abs. He has night vision.

Whenever he gives a snarky zinger he says “BURN!!!”

It was a dark and stormy night nag George the broken calculator was in his office. The lights were out,. The shades were drawn, but the street light was creeping through the slats as he sat at his desk with his feet up. He was sipping a beverage. MACHA TEA. Relaxing but a little worried. He hasn’t had a job in a long time. Maybe because he’s a calculator? Knock knock knock. Someone he doesn't know walks through the door. Famous-est singer in the world and explosive pig named Mona Lisa. He knew her. “Can I help you? “ “Are you a detective” Yes of course. Do you have a mystery?” “Yes. Someone took a speck of her ice cream out of the container. I was at a concert when it was stolen from my home. Neon pink was the ice cream.” George needs a case so he says yes. “Let’s visit to the scene of the crime” We cut to her home. Giant pig shaped mansion. There are too many red diamonds (unstolen FYI). The name of the house the 24K cheese house. Dallas, Texas. There are 25 thousand cats. As soon as we arrive. Gerog understands why she was so upset. She has a secret Ice cream collection in her house. The small amount of ice cream, to her, was a big deal. When they arrive a the house, she given him a tour. Then they arrive at the secret ice cream collection. George sees a clue. Soda can dog in the ice cream room who knocks down a vallina ice cream. It’s Mona Lisa’s dog. The lid of the vanilla comes open and a spoon comes out with a little bit of the pink ice cream on it. He dusts for prints. It’s Mona Lisa’s! “What’s the meaning of this!” Says George. “Mona Lisa says. I doesn’t know why they are on there!” She’s clearly lying. She really just wanted to meet him. SHE HAS A CRUSH ON HIM!. He’s flattered. But he’s also scandalized. He’s conflicted. He can’t deny that there is a lot to like. Also, he’s a lonely guy. Before he decided what to do, he decides that they need to spend time together. MONTAGE:

Juice Hut

Play in the park on the baby swing

Sing together

Watch Romantic Comedies all day

Take a tour of the planet Saturn

Go on a boat that’s a roller coaster

Go to a swimming pool for dogs.

Send each other notes

They Comb eachothers’ amazing hair

Base Jump together

At the end they are at a fancy restaurant itching pink ice cream together. Monsa Lisa says” We’ve really gotten to know each other, we’ve gone to great places. We’ve talked about our families. Talked about our feeling. We know each other well. I need to know. Because I still have a crush on you. What do you think? Will you marry me?” Do we add up? “YES!” She is so happy that she sings a brand new song. It’s called: I love a detective.

She was so happy that she exploded into a thousand piglets. George is happy.

Click to Read Original Stories from Other Episodes.

Roll Call Stories

Scroll down to read the original stories or watch Peter and Lee read them and react here:

Potato Monsters Have Jobs

by Julius, age 7, Washington, D.C.

Potatoes have jobs you see.

That’s why I bring you this story.

They can be firefighters, rabbis, and more.

But that’s a bad thing.

Because they turn into potato monsters!

THE CAT WHO THOUGHT IT WAS A DOG

by Alexandra, age 6, Massachusetts

One day there was a cat names Mittens. But he thought he was a dog. So one day he told his owner that he was a dog.

Then the owner said, “No, you are a cat, not a dog!”

But Mittens said, “But I look like a dog.”

The owner said, “But you think you are a dog, but you are not actually a dog.”

Mittens said, “How do you know I am a cat?”

Owner: “Well you have sharp claws.”

Mittens: “Some dogs have sharp claws.”

Owner: “Then why do you purr and hiss like a cat?”

Mittens: “Because I am a dog that purrs and hisses.”

Owner: “Then go to this location, I have a map, and the old lady will tell you if you are a cat or a dog.”

Mittens: “OK, I will! I will set off to find the old lady and she will tell me that I am a dog.”

Owner: “But you will have to cross rivers, lakes, and sandy beaches.”

Mittens: “OK bye, I am going!”

Then he has to go through the pond first actually. Then he goes through the lake. Then he has to go through the sandy beach. Then he approaches the house of the old lady.

Then the old lady says, “Hello, I can tell you if you are a cat or a dog. Is that what you are here for?”

Mittens says, “Yes!”

Then the old lady says, “You are a cat!”

Mittens says, “OK, I want to be a cat now.”

Then the cat makes its way home.

Then he wants to go to his friend – the dog who thought it was a cat – and the dog Biscuits said, “Hello, I am a cat.”

Mittens said, “No, you are a dog!”

THE END

Watermelon Cheese

by Rufus, age 8, UK

Have you heard of watermelon cheese?

What is watermelon cheese?

Oh, I know what it is. It’s the thing that pumps your blood.

Wait no, that’s not right. It’s the book written by Charles Dickens.

Wait no, that’s not right. It’s … it’s … me!

The Ice Skating Penguin - Wow in the World Crossover

Welcome to a world-shattering, must-be-heard-to-be-believed crossover episode between your two favorite podcasts: Story Pirates and Wow in the World! Featuring a brand new story by a 9 year old from Pennsylvania named Alice. 

Scroll down for the original stories behind the episode!

The Ice Skating Penguin

by Alice, age 9, Pennsylvania

Once upon a time there was a family of penguins. But there, ice skating was not allowed. And one of the penguins actually liked to ice skate. They got banished. Their family was so sad that they went to find the banished penguin. As they searched it got warmer and warmer. Then they realized they were very far from home. Then just at that moment they thought they found him, but it was an evil robot! They knew somebody had to be behind this. And they knew who! Mr. Dingle Penguin Hopper! So, they head southeast and northwest and there they find...Mr. Dingle Penguin Hopper! They said...destroy all the clone robots! But, he just put the family in a cage over lava! They were very frightened! But just then...the banished penguin appeared! He said, I have come to save you all! They all cheered! But he said keep it down! They all whispered, ok! He started pulling them up one by one. They all escaped! And now they got to ice skate and lived happily ever after.

SEE BELOW FOR 2 MAPS!

Click to Read Original Stories from Other Episodes.

Roll Call Stories

Scroll down to read the original stories or watch Peter and Lee read them and react here:

The Walking Blanket Who Walks All The Way to the Store

by Rosie, age 5, Nebraska

Once upon a time there was a blanket and it got sprayed with living spray and came alive. Flowerman is the one who sprayed the blanket. So, Flowerman decided that he had to go to the store to buy apples, orange juice, apple juice and a new phone because his old phone died and wouldn’t come alive. So, Flowerman sent the blanket to the store. The End.

The Adventures of George and the T-Rex

by George, age 7, Virginia

The story begins when George goes back in time, and then sees a T-Rex. He checks to see if the T-Rex plays a role in time. Then they become friends, because the T-Rex is friendly, even though he's big. Then, they get in the time machine which is small, but the T-Rex fits in the seat, and George sits on his lap. And then they go forward in time, to the exact second in 2025 when George went back in time.

Then George and his parents tell the T-Rex to try eating some salad. And he likes it!

Then, they tell the T-Rex about spinning food [which is sushi on a conveyor belt] at the mall. The T-Rex RUNS there. When they get to spinning food, and the T-Rex gets in, he has to crawl. They ask if they can have a spot reserved in the mall because the T-Rex is large. They get seats in an extra-large booth. The family asks if the chefs can make sushi that is the same size of the T-Rex's mouth. They say yes, and the T-Rex gets to eat sushi and cake! He likes everything. They get some toys for the T-Rex and they go back home.

Then they order a humongous amount of pillows. They order the largest pillow in the world so it can be his pillow. And they get a bunch of blankets and a humongous couch for it to sleep on. And it's very comfortable. He lives underground so he sleeps underground where he has slides, ball pits, everything a human could want.

To be continued...

No, just kidding!

Hey T-Rex, guess what?

"WHAAAAAT?"

The End!

The Opera Contest

by Mariella, age 8, Maryland

The Opera Contest

On Wednesday, there was an opera contest. Anna went and she got the prize. Then she was the president.

The end.

Bear's Forest Days

Scroll down for the original stories behind the episode!

Bear’s Forest Days

by Belle, age 9, Oklahoma

Bear wakes up. He goes into his closet. He puts on a soft, red shirt. Bear goes to the berry bush. He gathers berries for breakfast. On his way back with a berry branch, he sees Rabbit. “Hello, Rabbit!” Bear says. “Hello!” Rabbit says back. When Bear gets home, his table is gone! Bear eats his berries on the floor instead. Every day Bear has a problem and every day Bear finds a solution. After he eats his berries, Bear goes out to look for a chopped-down tree. Bear runs into his friend Cardinal. “Why good morning good morning!” says Cardinal. “Good morning to you too!” says Bear. “Sorry,” says Cardinal. “No time to talk! I’m busy making morning songs for the animals in the forest.” Bear remembered that his mama bear said you only need one or two good friends that you trust. That’s why he’s happy to have Rabbit and Cardinal! Bear finds a chopped-down tree and then he tears the stump of the tree out of the ground so he can use it as a table. Bear gets some big rocks so he can use them as stools to go with the table. When he gets home, Bear is thirsty from all the work. Bear goes to the stream to get a drink. He goes back home and has some lunch and then takes a nap. After Bear’s nap, he talks to Rabbit. Bear leaves after a while and goes home. As soon as he knew it, it was five o’clock! Bear goes to the stream to catch fish. After he gets the fish, he takes a bath in the stream. Bear eats his dinner. Bear put on his pajamas and a nightcap that has clouds on them. Bear goes to bed hoping for a good Tuesday tomorrow.

Click to Read Original Stories from Other Episodes.

Roll Call Stories

Scroll down to read the original stories or watch Peter and Lee read them and react here:

New Eyebrows

by Gemma, age 12, Idaho

Vinegar in My Bagel

by Caleb, age 6, Maryland

Once I was sitting at a kitchen table at a restaurant. Actually the name of the restaurant was The Kitchen, so every table was the kitchen table. I ordered a bagel, but I noticed there was vinegar on my bagel. I wanted a cinnamon bagel, not a vinegar bagel. We told the police that the chef was being mean and gave me vinegar on my bagel. The police fired the chef. The chef was angry because cinnamon bagels were too much work. The chef had to go to the underground slime puddle. Except the underground slime puddle had baking soda in it, so when the chef tried to use vinegar in it, it exploded everywhere.The chef turned into a goblin, and the restaurant was sticky with goo. The people watching asked what was going on, but one of the customers shouted The End, so no one found out why they were gooey.

Super Banana

by Harlow, age 7, Wisconsin

Once a banana did not like crime. Every day he wached the news there was a crime right befor. When he turned sixteen he made a cape and mask. He was a super hero! They called him Super banana. One day Super banana was snachet from behind. It wash his arch nemess! The evill PomPom! He was a gint PomPom! He Pelled Super banana! He ate Super banana! Super banana had a chanse to tikle PomPom and he took it! He was free! the end or is it?

The Real Reason Why Aliens Go to Farms

Have you ever wondered where crop circles come from? Well, today’s brand new story has the answer! Written by a 12 year old from California named Logan.

Scroll down for the original stories behind the episode!

The Real Reason Why Aliens Go to Farms

by Logan, age 12, California

So long ago in the ancient times of 1981, there lived a man named Jeffrey, and aliens didn’t get along with Earth. They would steal gold, diamonds, and money and weren’t the nicest to us humans. Until one day, Jeffrey, who was making a burger, saw aliens taking his money from his safe in the kitchen. Without thinking, he threw a burger that he was making, but the aliens ate it in mid-air. But the aliens liked it, but they didn’t like the pickles. It made their eyes like googly eyes. The rest made them sick, but they liked the bread and meat. So Jeffrey said, “you can take all the corn you want to make the bread and all the cows you want for the meat as long as you don’t eat me The aliens agreed, and they said (alien voice pls):

We won’t take your resources if you give us that stuff. So he agreed, and if you’re wondering what crop circles are, then it is just aliens saying thank you to Jeff in alien language.

Click to Read Original Stories from Other Episodes.

Roll Call Stories

Scroll down to read the original stories or watch Peter and Lee read them and react here:

Mopsy and Teddy, the Superhero Dogs

by Peter, age 5, Georgia

One time Mopsy and Teddy were at their secret hideout, and they had a computer. The computer said, “ALERT, ALERT, ALERT.” And then the two superheroes flew to their super vehicles and went to Planet Badoongyface. Then the superhero dogs went throughout the whole universe, and they discovered something new. They discovered a wormhole! They went into the wormhole, and they ended up in an “upside down crazy world.” Suddenly, people and dinosaurs came alive all around them. And suddenly, a dragon came! But then everything transformed into bananas. Then Mopsy and Teddy defeated the dragon. Then they got in their flying ship and went back through the wormhole and landed safely at last. The end.

I Have the Hiccups

by Grace, age 7, Massachusetts

The Wonky Dragon

by Grayson, age 8, California